Motivation Comes in Stages .:Great:.

I am about to do something that I try really hard to avoid, well because I hate doing it. Showing my emotions, I mean. Sooo, just give me a moment as I peel away... a layer, or two.

...

Okay, anyhoot, I truely believe that there is a limited amount of times that one person can handle a wave of disappointment or failure (double that number if you're a designer). And with a little over two weeks left til my 20th birthday, I am having trouble with grasping the concept that there will be many more moments like these in hand.

As a college student (at least 5 moments of disappointment and failure are inevitable), ups and downs are a part of the growing experience. HOWEVER!!! When you go through a whole semester of seclusion from your friends and at least twenty-five all nighters, only to find out that you failed the class that you KNEW that you were going to pass because you seemed to feel no sense of threat what so ever, from that ghostly looking woman... .:ahmm, got carried away there, back to business:. you begin to loose that determination. Going into my junior year and having already failed four classes, I expect my invitation to the class of 2013 in my mailbox really soon.

After recieving this info, I held my composure about the situation until a had a delightfully dreadful conversation with my mom whom 'didn't want to preach to me, but just wanted to get some things off of her chest' (generally the same thing), concerning the rest of my college career. That's when I cried like a little bitch. Parallel to the wave of disaster when fishnet shirts came back into style during the early 00's (pronoucned oh-ohs; 2000's). Even then, I disappointed my current self, by having three of those dreadful sea net shirts. How come no one warned me?!

I guess that I had to learn the hard way .:UGH! Such foolywang:.

That is not me in the picture by the way, ekkies. I never wore them like that anyway. Nice pack though there, girl.

I have so many ideas, intentions, goals, w/e!!!, but the motivation to keep them alive dies out just as fast as it did for them to come up. So, what is the problem? (That's a rhetorical question, I'm about to answer it in a few seconds).

I AM LAZY. (See, told you).
Only in spurts though.

Like, this week I'll be filled with motivation and persistence out of the who hah, but then two weeks later, I'm drained. And this will last all through-out school too. So, other than this foolishness of failing this class, what am I going to do in order to X out the whole, "work 10 years just to prove that you are worth a chance," scenario, as told by my mother.

Well, lucky for me, (I guess), I have come across a few ideas (thanx to my homegirl, Kimora Lee...okay, she's not my homegirl (I wish), but she's my business idolista), that will probably last me to the end of this month... No, they will last til the end of fabulosity (you should get the book by the way).



TheeFashionista's and Kimora's Rules of Persistence!

1. When you have a good idea, be tenacious like a pit bull! Hang on tight (like that cat on them cute little posters, lol .:anyhoot:.) and get it done your way-- don't let people who aren't particularly invested in your success tell you otherwise.

2. When you put in solid effort, you build yourself a solid step from which to reach higher and stretch farther-- you can stand up strong on the back of all your hard work and view new horizons you couldn't glimpse before. Coasting through a job and never applying yourself will keep you forever on that flat ground.

3. It's scary to take a leap and put yourself out there. It's going to take a ton of effort, and so you can stall for a long time thinking about it. Should I take this job, or shouldn't I? Should I do my next assignment on this, or something else? Should I take out a loan for school or go flip burgers? But, when it is time to start a new venture, tell yourself, "Life is a series of adjustments: You can make changes along the way, but if you don't start moving forward, you'll never get anywhere."

These rules come from Kimora's book, Fabulosity, which is definitely a must read. I put a few tweeks in the rules too now! But, from all of this I realize that it sometimes seems like I have to live my life for other people and that I have to work hard in order to meet their expectations and in the end, I become so overwhelmed that I abandon the true task at hand. It's important to bring it back around and realize my potential so I can take advantage of it. So just like my idolista would say, "You've got one life; use your talents for good because you can never get tired of it. Learn to expect much for yourself and screw what others think!" I love my homegirl.